In Search of a Life that Matters
Welcome to 2017! Over the next few weeks, I will be highlighting concepts and approaches that are aimed at helping us to rediscover ourselves and our power to change our own lives and the lives of others for the better.
Passion and purpose? What do those words really mean anyway?
I recently watched Dancer, a docudrama that followed the career of professional ballet dancer, Sergei Polunin. I was drawn to the “movie” as I am to almost all that integrate the beautiful physical movements of professional dancers. The movie resonated with me, however, because of his painful quest to find his place in the world, especially as it related to his vocation. As depicted in the film, Polunin had little say in his choice of career. His family placed him on the road to professional ballet, which he was exceptional at from an early age. At the height of his career, he walked away from a prestigious position as principal dancer for the Royal Ballet of London. His quest was made even more painful by the deep sense of abandonment that he felt as his family separated from him to support him financially in his dancing career. He eventually appears to choose dance for himself and rediscovers his love for it. I believe that a big part of that process was his recognition of the impact his dancing was having on others, and the healing of his family relationships that had started to take place.
I took several things away from the movie:
Being good at something does not mean that you love it or that it should be your vocation. In one heartbreaking moment, Polunin said that he wished he would be injured so that he would no longer have to dance.
At some point, we must choose who are and who we want to be. We need to identify and filter what others have projected onto us, social imperatives that have been imposed on us, and the fears that we have internalized, and choose our own path. This cannot be chosen for us.
Passion and purpose are interwoven with community. We find our best selves through authentic relationships – those that are characterized by unconditional love and empathy, and an openness to hearing us without judgement.
In watching Polunin’s amazing talent, few would question whether he was meant to dance. Conventional wisdom tells us that we were all created for one vocation. However, conventional wisdom is changing:
People are changing careers multiple times over their lifespans to find the right fit for themselves during different stages and phases of their lives.
People are keeping food on their proverbial tables by doing jobs that are financially rewarding but they find fulfilment by investing otherwise in avocations that they love such as music or writing.
People are designing multiple iterations of their futures and are simply trying them on for size.
People can no longer find job titles that accurately capture all that they do or how they define themselves, and therefore find creative and innovative ways of talking about their work.
These all seem to be useful considerations in contexts where so many of us are pigeonholed into prescribed vocations such as “doctor”, “psychologist”, “accountant”, “marketing executive”, or “teacher”. But what if the search for passion and purpose was much more fundamental? In his book A Hidden Wholeness, Parker Palmer suggests that passion and purpose emerge out of ensuring congruence and continuity between who we say we are, that is, our core values and beliefs, and the behaviours and choices that we display. In committing to that process, we find our authentic selves. This in turn, helps us to identify our unique voice and the contribution that we can make to the world. He challenges us to commit to guarding and releasing that voice with authenticity and to remain faithful to ourselves and the work even amid challenging circumstances that bring no glory to us.
This is where most well-recognized life planning systems start. In my next blog, I will examine the key features of these and discuss how we can apply them in ways that are hopefully life-giving and transformative. So, stay tuned.
How do you understand "passion" and "purpose"?
